Tuesday, April 9, 2013

With Every Flaw

Take it or leave it, here is a story about my continual struggle with 
acne. If you’d like to skip ahead and read about the products 
I’ve had the most success with, click here.

{Today my skin is seeing better days, but I still have a breakout almost every week.
"Oh hey, pimple, right by my mouth!" This is a photo of me with makeup. I pray, one day,

 I'll be brave enough to post a photo without makeup!}

It's something that's stalked me for years. It's something like a mask that suppresses my ideas of who I hope to be and it interferes with the way I interact with other people. I know I'm not the only one to experience this–-and I know things could be far, far worse–-but everyday when I see my reflection in the mirror, I'm reminded that my frustrating case of acne truly has control over my self-perceived value.

Am I being dramatic? Probably. Should I care this much? Nope. 

Still, I can't help but feel judged. I often feel that others view my flawed complexion as a result of a lack of good hygiene. When my friends complain about a microscopic zit, I can't help but think, If that's considered bad, what do they think of my disastrous skin? Yes, I know, these are irrational thoughts and the world isn't thinking about my skin nearly as much as I do, but these lies continue to flood my mind with every conversation and every meeting with the mirror. 

I'm 22 years young, but consider myself to be an adult who shouldn't have to deal with this issue. I've tried more than my fair share of prescription, drugstore, and luxury skincare products to diminish these pesky flaws that have broken my confidence time and time again. 

In the last couple of moths I threw away the topical gels and the harsh antibiotic pills. I began reading health books that recommended specific diets for clearer skin. I started taking natural vitamins that have done more for my skin than any prescribed antibiotics. Then, I stumbled upon a skin cleansing system that seems to be working well for my oily complexion. 

{Read my review and breakdown of my current routine here. It may seem like a lot of work, but if you struggle with acne as well, I promise you’ll want to read this!}

Now, when my makeup is stripped away, I still see the scars and the occasional breakout, which serve as painful reminders of my self-doubt and of times when my confidence was shaken. In the back of my mind I worry that the skin I had a year ago will return in full force. Even so, I’ll continue to strive to give my insecurities to God, knowing He is the only One who can provide true restoration and the only One who loves me unconditionally, and with every flaw


  1. Oh, Elissa. I'm sorry to hear about your skin struggles and how it has affected you. I have the opposite problem - my skin is SO dry. It's flaky and scaly and yucky and I haven't found a good way to tame it. I don't like to talk about it and I'm self-conscious. So, I can relate.

    With that said, I do not have any skin advice for you BUT Crunchy Betty has some awesome natural beauty remedies. I have heard really good things about the scary sounding oil cleansing method.

    I hope that the Lord will remind you every day how beautiful you are. :)

    The Brayn of Chalayn

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  3. I had a typo sorry lol...Here's my essay comment:

    Thanks for sharing about your personal acne problem! I thought you always looked radiant in photos and in person when we met. We are our own worst critics so I can say I have the WORST skin haha! No, really. I've had the pesky acne issue ever since 6th grade and it got so bad and inflamed, my dad thought my skin was going to fall off--pretty horrific yes.

    It was brutal and I had so much sadness from it as well as being teased mercilessly by family and friends. I even prayed to God to take it all away over and over then cry myself to sleep. I know, so dramatic, but for us girls it's absolutely devastating to have a severe case that everyone can clearly see on our bare skin. I didn't start wearing makeup regularly until I was 16-18.

    Moving on, after trying Proactive(dried the living daylights out of my oily skin and the so-called purge stage just made it worse), Murad(too many chemicals, but it did wipe away tons especially with the body wash and supplements then it all comes back if you stop), Origins/Dr. Weil (started to get immune to it), and every over the counter brand you can think of.

    I realized it was mostly due to diet and exercise. My skin is the clearest it has ever been and it's because I stopped eating tons of junk food. Choosing organic and non-processed foods is excellent. I mean why did the people in the Bible live so long? Because they ate the PUREST food grown by the Creator! I've started working out each week as well and it lets my skin detox and breathe. Also, some show the bad things they eat in other ways like weight-gain, organ issues, digestive issues, etc...Mine showed ALL OVER my face for everyone to see. So it begins with diet and then the products you use added on top of that.

    After getting a facial by a very organic/natural product friendly esthetician, I can say my skin isn't that bad anymore. She said that as well which was so relieving! She gave me the Credentials brand to use and diagnosed my skin as being combination (that was probably half my issue haha). The cleanser and moisturizer are excellent and doesn't irritate my highly reactive sensitive combination skin. I've tried Clinique and I saw you use it now as well. The alcohol content inflamed and dried my skin, but I hope it works out for you. I wish there was a cure for acne sometimes, but we wouldn't learn to accept flaws...

    I know this is a ridiculously long post, but acne really is a personal issue and hits home for me and I hate that you are going through bouts of it. Just know you are loved and perfect Elissa. Thanks for blessing us with your weekly posts! I look forward to reading more :).


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